Crystal Gem Lapis
by Kiaooftheblade
Summary: "My name is Lapis Lazuli, and I am a Crystal Gem." AU where Lapis does what she should've done at the end of Jail Break.
1. Prolouge

I don't own Steven Universe in any way, shape, or form.

* * *

Prologue

Something was obviously wrong. The distant explosion and the sudden rocking followed by the alarms and the sudden feeling of the ship rapidly descending all lead Lapis to that conclusion. The only thing she didn't know was what caused it. Her best guess was that Steven had found and freed the other Crystal Gems and that they had fought against Jasper and Peridot, and during that fight, they damaged the ship in some way. Lapis hugged her knees close to her chest and drooped her head forward as the ship dropped from the sky, ready for what would come next.

The blue gem was thrown forward as the ship impacted the ground. She began to rise when there was another explosion, this one much larger, and was forced back to the ground as chunks of the ship fell, burying her. She lay there, momentarily stunned, and took stock of her self. Her gem was somehow undamaged, and aside from a few scrapes and bruises, her physical form was undamaged as well.

She heard a voice coming from somewhere nearby. It was muffled by the rubble above her, but sounded vaguely like Jasper. She couldn't understand what she was saying, but felt a need to escape, to get away from here. Using all of her strength, she rose to her feet, throwing off the rubble that pinned her, and fell to her knees. She looked up and saw the orange Gem standing only a few feet away, looking at her with evil intent in her eyes. Without hesitation, Lapis summoned her wings of water and leapt into the air. She only made it a few feet into the air when she felt Jasper tightly grab hold of her leg.

"Come here, brat!" Jasper said, pulling her down, then took hold of her arm and held her up like a doll, "Ahh, don't fly off so soon."

"Lapis!" Steven called out from the other side of the beach.

"Lapis, listen, fuse with me!" Jasper said.

"What?" Lapis responded, raising her head to look at her.

"How long did they keep you trapped her on this miserable hunk of rock?" Jasper asked, dropping her to the ground, "These Gems, they're traitors to their Homeworld. They kept you prisoner. They used you. This is your chance to take revenge!"

Lapis rose to her feet as Jasper spoke and looked across the beach at the Gems. Jasper was right. The Crystal Gems had imprisoned and used her for thousands of years, taken her life away from her, taken away her free will, taken her entire existence away from her.

"Come on, just say yes."

That was all it would take. One simple word, and she could destroy those who had all but destroyed her. One word and she could have vengeance for the injustice she suffered for thousands of years.

"Lapis, don't do it!" Steven said, struggling against Amethyst and Pearl who held onto him protectively.

Lapis narrowed her eyes, then dropped her head forward, eyes closed and turned around. She took a deep breath and raised her head, opening her eyes and looked Jasper square in the face.

"No," she said.

Jaspers cocky grin turned into a snarl at that one word.

"What?" she demanded.

"I said, no," Lapis repeated.

Jasper let out a growl and began to walk forward.

"Then you can just die with the rest of these worthless traitors!"

Lapis quickly raised a hand and summoned several tendrils of water from the ocean and wrapped them around Jasper, pinning her arms to her sides and keeping her in place.

"Urgh! Let me go!" Jasper shouted, struggling against the binds.

"Somebody do something!" Lapis called over shoulder, "I can't hold her like this for long!"

Like a flash, Garnet came rushing past Lapis, gauntlets appearing on her hands in a flash of light. Reaching Jasper, she stopped, crouched, then sprung up, upper cutting Jasper in the jaw. Jasper cried out in pain then poofed, her gem dropping to the ground and the water splashing down around it. The fusion put her weapon away and knelt down, bubbled the gem and turned around as she stood back up.

She looked at Lapis for a few seconds before saying, "Thank you."

Lapis turned away and looked out across the ocean.

"Just make sure that bubble stays intact," she replied.

Garnet nodded and sent the bubble away.

"Lapis!" Steven called out as he ran up to her and hugged her, "I'm so glad you're okay Lapis."

Lapis smiled and looked down at him.

"I'm glad you're okay as well."

The sound of crunching sand caught her attention. She looked over to see Pearl and Amethyst walking over to her.

"What are you going to do now Lapis?" Pearl asked, "Are you going to go back to Homeworld?"

Lapis sighed and looked back out over the ocean.

"No. Homeworlds changed so much. There's nothing there for me anymore. And even if I did go back, they'd probably just send me back here with even more Gems."

"You're gonna stay here?" Steven asked excitedly, "With us?"

"I'll probably stay here on Earth, but I don't know where."

"You can stay with us at the temple!" he suggested, "You can join the Crystal Gems!"

"Steven!" Pearl shouted.

"Uh, no offense dude, but she did try to steal the ocean and kill us before," Amethyst said.

"She nearly drowned you and Connie," Garnet said.

"But, she was just trying to get home," Steven said.

"That doesn't excuse my actions," Lapis said, kneeling down and placing her hands on Steven's shoulders, "I did terrible things to you and I'm sorry for that, but that doesn't change the fact that I still did them."

Steven's expression dropped as he looked into Lapis's eyes. The joy and excitement was gone, replaced with uncertainty and a small bit of fear. Lapis felt a twinge of sadness within her followed by a tear welling up in her eye. She stood up and wiped it away, turning back to the sea.

"Thank you for the offer Steven, but I can't. The only place for me on this planet is at the bottom of your oceans."

"But, Lapis…" Steven said taking a step forward.

Lapis turned to look at him and shook her head.

"I'm sorry Steven, but it has to be this way," she said, then looked up at the other Gems, "I promise I won't try anything. I'll live under the oceans peacefully. Don't come looking for me and I won't do anything to you."

The Gems all shared a look, then turned back to Lapis and nodded. She nodded in return and, with a sad smile, began to walk into the sea. She stopped a when she about waist deep and turned back around to look at Steven.

"Beach-summer-fun-buddies forever," she said.

"Beach-summer-fun-buddies forever," Steven replied sadly.

Turning back she continued forward until she disappeared beneath the surface. The Gems stood in silence for a moment, watching the spot where Lapis had vanished.

"Well, this will be interesting," Garnet said adjusting her glasses slightly.

Steven's phone began to suddenly ring and he quickly answered it.

"Hello?"

"Steven! I got your message, are you okay?" Connie's worried voice asked from the other end, "What's going on? Steven?

* * *

Thanks for reading and be sure to leave a nice review!


	2. Chapter 1

I don't own Steven Universe in any way, shape, or form.

* * *

Chapter 1

Lapis floated lazily on her back through the ocean staring up towards the surface. She was to far down to see it, but was close enough that the light from the sun could filter down to her, illuminating the dark depths she now called home. A sudden movement caught her eye and she turned to see a small school of colorful fish swim by. With a smile, Lapis turned over and swam after them, gracefully and effortlessly cutting through the water, being careful not to get to close and scare them.

Lapis spent most of her days like this at the bottom of the sea. She found the sea life beautiful and fascinating. She didn't know what any of the various species of fish were called, but she still loved them.

A shark suddenly swam towards the fish she was following, causing them to scatter. Lapis stopped when the predator arrived and turned away, not wishing to bear witness to what would come next. She knew it was the natural order of things but that didn't make it any less difficult to see. She turned back after a moment to see that the shark had gone and a faint, slowly dissipating red mist was the only indication that it had been there.

With a small, sad sigh, Lapis floated down and sat on a large rock. She looked back up towards the surface, staring at the sun, a small, blurry circle at the depth she was at, no larger then dime.

"This isn't the beauty you saw in this world, is it, Rose Quartz?" she said, "You never saw this, did you?"

She looked around her as she spoke, looking at all the aquatic creatures that swam by, at the coral and seaweed, at the urchins and starfish that occupied the seafloor.

"It was the humans. That's what you fought to protect. But these creatures, this world, they're just as beautiful as your precious humans. They're worth protecting just as much."

Lapis sighed again and looked back up towards the surface.

"I never understood why you it did back then, but now I think I do. I think I feel something like what you felt. This need, this desire, to protect these creatures. Does that make me like you now? Does that mean I'm a Crystal Gem? Would they even accept me as one of them? Well, Steven would. But the others?"

Lapis closed her eyes and bowed her head forward, hugging her knees.

"Could I really be one of them? After the things they did to me? After the things I did to them? And what about Homeworld? Can I actually turn my back on them? Can I really be a Crystal Gem?"

As she sat, contemplating everything, Lapis felt something brush past her. She looked up and saw a small school of fish swimming past. She watched them swim for a long moment then turned her gaze upwards.

"I have to at least try."

She shot upwards, reaching the surface in a matter of seconds. She broke through and floated there, staring out at the endless expanse of water in front of her. She turned in place, looking around, finding nothing but ocean in every direction. She stared forward, confused.

"Wait, where am I?"

* * *

After several days of swimming in every possible direction, Lapis finally found herself in familiar waters. The beach she had left from so many months ago was in sight, the statue around temple the Crystal Gems called home watching her as she approached. Slowing down, she dropped to the sea floor, walking the last few yards, slowly rising out of the water as she did.

As she approached, she heard a familiar voice call out "Guys! Guys! Lapis is here!" from the temple. She smiled at the sound of Stevens voice, stopping as she reached the beach and watched the temple. After a moment, the door opened and the Crystal Gems came leaping down, landing a few feet away from Lapis. Steven came running down slope, stopping near Pearl to catch his breath.

"See," he panted, "I told you Lapis would come back!"

"Huh. Steven was right and Pearl was wrong. That's new," Amethyst said.

"I was not wrong!" Pearl barked at her, "I said that it was highly unlikely that Lapis would come back, not that she wouldn't."

"Eh, same difference," Amethyst said with a shrug.

"No it's not!"

"Um, isn't anyone going to ask me why I came back?" Lapis asked.

"Oh, yes, of course!" Pearl said turning to Lapis, "That's a much better topic to discuss then semantics. Why are you here Lapis?"

"Are you gonna stay here with us? Are you gonna join the Crystal Gems?" Steven asked excitedly.

"That… is my intention, yes," Lapis replied with a nod, then looked to Garnet, "If you'll accept me."

Garnet stared at her for a long moment, then looked at the others and said, "Gems, huddle up."

The four of them huddled up and began talking quietly amongst themselves. Even thought she couldn't hear them, she knew what they were talking about. She turned and looked out at the sea, waiting for them to finish. After a few minutes, she heard Garnet say her name and turned back around to face them.

"Have you come to a decision then?" she asked.

Garnet nodded. "We have. We're willing to give you a trial run. We'll let you join us temporarily and, when your time is up, if we feel we can trust you and that your intentions are as you say they are, we will let you join full time."

"Yes, that's about what I expected you to say," Lapis replied, nodding.

Steven ran forward, hugging Lapis tightly.

"Yay! Lapis is joining the team!" he said.

Lapis smiled and hugged him back.

"I hope so Steven. I hope so."

* * *

"This is… different," Lapis said, looking around, "This is what a human house looks like?"

"More or less," Steven replied.

Lapis stood in the doorway of the house with Steven, looking around the room. The others had gone into the temple, saying they needed to discuss Lapis's temporary status in a bit more detail, leaving Steven to give her a tour of the house. Lapis looked around, taking everything in as she walked around, drifting towards the kitchen and stopping near the stove.

"What's this device?" she asked, pointing at it.

"That's a stove. You use it to cook food."

"Food…" she said slowly, as if it were a foreign word, contemplating it, trying to understand its meaning.

"Humans need food," she said after a moment, "To get energy to live."

"That's right," Steven said nodding.

"You're human, but you're also part Gem. Can you not draw energy from your gem?"

"Nope," he replied shaking his head, "Even if I could though, I wouldn't be able to live off of it. The human part of me needs stuff you can only get out of food."

Lapis stared at him for a moment before crouching down and placing a hand on his stomach.

"You're such an interesting creature Steven. There's never been anything like you before. You truly are one of a kind."

Steven giggled and placed a hand on Lapis's.

"I know. The Gems tell me that all the time."

"The Gems…" Lapis said, looking over at the temple door, "Do you really think they could ever accept me?"

"Well, they're giving you a chance, so they probably will," Steven replied with a smile.

"I do hope so. Say, what happened to Amethyst?"

"What do mean?"

"She looked as if she regenerated since the last time I'd seen her. I'm curious as to what happened."

"Oh yeah. That happened when we were chasing the Slinker."

"The… Slinker?"

"It was a corrupted Gem monster that was in the temple. It poofed Amethyst four times."

"Four times?"

"Yeah. Amethyst kept rushing her regenerations though. Me and Garnet were getting really worried."

"And in the end she ultimately decided on that one?"

Steven nodded.

"It looks nice on her."

"You should've seen the other ones. On one of them she made herself look like Pearl. She even acted like Pearl."

"Really? I would loved to have seen that," Lapis said with a chuckle, "A Quartz, pretending to be a Pearl."

"What do you mean, a Pearl?" Steven asked confused.

"Steven, what do you know about Pearls?"

"I know about Pearl," he replied glancing at the temple door.

"No no, I'm talking about other Pearls."

"There are other Pearls?" Steven exclaimed, eyes going wide.

Lapis looked at Steven for a moment before looking over at the temple door.

"What have the Gems told you about Homeworld?" she asked looking back at him.

"Um… They told me that Homeworld wanted to do something bad to the Earth and my mom stopped them."

"They haven't told you anything about life on Homeworld? About what the kinds of roles different Gems had?"

Steven shook his head. Lapis looked back at the door and frowned.

"I see. I'm sure they have their reasons for not telling you. And I don't think it would be my place to tell you. I'm sure they'll tell you in time though."

Steven looked over at the door as well then down at his gem. Lapis watched him for a moment then stood back up and made her towards Steven sleeping area.

"Say Steven, what's this?" she asked pointing at the television.

* * *

"All humans do this?" Lapis whispered.

Pearl nodded in response.

"Why?" Lapis asked looking over at her.

"I've never been entirely sure. As far as I can tell, humans need time to recharge themselves and this is how they do it," Pearl whispered back.

Lapis looked back to Steven who lay in his bed, fast asleep. The two Gems sat nearby, watching him. The Gems had decided that until they made their final decision on Lapis, one of them would be with her at all times, watching her. Pearl was given the first watch.

"It's kind of like when retreat into our gems," Lapis said.

Pearl brought a hand to her chin and looked down, contemplating what Lapis just said.

"I never thought of it that way, but I suppose, in a way, it kind of is," she responded after a few seconds.

"It's a very interesting thing."

"Yes. That's why started doing this. I wanted to better understand it. Although Steven doesn't like it when I do this."

"He doesn't?"

Pearl shook her head.

"He seemed a little… freaked out when he found out and asked me not to anymore."

"Oh. I suppose we shouldn't be doing this then," Lapis said and looked around a bit, settling her gaze on the screen door, "I think I'll go outside for a bit."

Pearl nodded and followed behind her. Once outside, they both leaned against the railing, staring up at the night sky in silence.

"Do… Do you belong to Steven?" Lapis tentatively asked after a moment.

Pearls entire body tensed up and she tightly griped the railing, causing it to crack slightly.

"Why would you think that?" she tensely replied.

"You were Rose Quartz's Pearl, right? From what I understand, Steven inherited her gem and all of her powers," Lapis explained, "I just thought that-"

"I don't belong to anyone," Pearl interrupted, "I haven't belonged to anyone for thousands of years."

"I'm… I'm sorry," Lapis quickly apologized.

Pearl loosened her grip on the railing and seemed to relax somewhat, letting out a long breath as she did.

"It's alright," she said after a moment, "You didn't know. Best you learned now rather then later I suppose."

"Right, of course. It's just so different here. I guess I'm just not used to the way you do things here quite yet."

"That's alright Lapis. It took a while for me and Garnet to adjust to it," Pearl smiled and placed a hand on her shoulder, "It'll come to you in time. Don't worry about it to much."

* * *

Thanks for reading, and be sure to leave a nice review!


	3. Chapter 2

I don't own Steven Universe in anyway, shape, or form.

* * *

Chapter 2

"This is food?" Lapis said inspecting the donut in her hand.

"It's a kind of food," Amethyst replied shoving a donut into her mouth, "Try it!"

"Yeah come on Lapis, try it!" Steven said excitedly as he pulled a donut out of the bag in his hand.

The three of them stood outside of the Big Donut. Steven wanted to take Lapis out to show her around Beach City and since it was Amethysts turn to watch her, she came along too.

Lapis continued to stare at the ring shaped pastry for a moment before she brought it up to her mouth and took a small bite. She chewed it slowly before swallowing.

"Hmm, interesting," she said, "This isn't at all what I expected food to be like."

"What were you expecting?" Steven asked, taking a bite of his own donut.

"I'm not really sure. Something more… I don't know, bland, I guess?"

"Not all foods like this," Amethyst said eating another donut in one bite, "Some of it is pretty terrible."

"Maybe I'll just stick to food like this then," Lapis said as she took another bite.

"You haven't even gotten to the best part yet!" Amethyst said with a huge grin on her face.

"What's that?"

Amethyst motioned for Lapis to come closer. The taller gem leaned forward and Amethyst began to whisper something into her ear. Steven watched them while eating his donut, unable to hear what Amethyst was saying. He was very confused when he saw Lapis's face contort in disgust. She looked over at Steven then whispered something to Amethyst who nodded, still grinning.

"You know what," Lapis said standing back up, "Maybe I'll just leave the food to the humans."

"Eh, your loss," Amethyst said taking the donut from her hand and quickly devouring it.

Lapis turned away and looked back at the Big Donut. Through the window, she could see Lars watching her. As soon as she looked at him, Lars quickly turned away. He shot a quick glance back over at her then went into the back of the store, disappearing from sight.

"So, where to next Steven?" she asked turning back to him.

"Next is Funland!" Steven exclaimed.

"What's Funland?" Lapis asked.

"It's the little amusement park over there on the boardwalk," Steven said pointing.

"I see. And what's an amusement park?"

"Well, an amusement park… It's like, um…"

"Dude, it'll be easier to just show her," Amethyst said patting him on the shoulder as she started walking towards Funland.

"Amethyst wait up!" Steven called as he chased after her, then turned around and called out, "Lapis come on!"

"Coming!" she said and followed.

Within a minute or so, the three of them arrived in front of a large archway covered in neon lights with the word "Funland" written on it in big, light up letters.

"Here we are Lapis!" Steven declared, turning to face her with his arms outstretched, "Welcome to Funland!"

"I see," Lapis said looking up at the sign, then past Steven to and into the amusement park itself, "So what exactly does one do at Funland?"

"You have fun!"

"Right, I figured that much. I meant, how does one have fun here?"

"Oh, well, you ride on rides and you play games, and, you know, stuff like that."

"Interesting. I'm very excited to see what exactly these rides and games are," Lapis said as she took a step towards the entrance.

"Wait! We can't go in yet!" Steven cried out, stopping her, "We have wait for someone else to get here first!"

"Wait for someone?" Lapis said confusedly and turned to Amethyst, "Do you know who were waiting for?"

Amethyst shrugged and grunted in a way that conveyed a feeling of 'I dunno'.

Lapis stared at her for a second before sighing and turned back to Steven.

"So, who are we waiting for then?"

"It's a surprise! But they should be here pretty soon, so we won't have to wait to long."

As if on cue, they could hear the sound of someone running towards them, accompanied by a voice calling out, "I'm here!"

Lapis turned to see a young girl about Stevens age coming towards them. She stared at her confusedly as she approached. Lapis had no idea who this girl was, and yet she was incredibly familiar.

"Sorry I'm late," she panted as she stopped near Steven.

"Don't worry about it, you're right on time," Amethyst said putting a hand on her shoulder.

She let out a small sigh of relief as she caught her breath and stood up straight, looked to Lapis, and extended a hand towards her.

"Hello Lapis," she said with a big smile, "I'm Connie. It's nice to meet you."

"Connie…" Lapis said slowly, as is it were a particularly complicated riddle she was trying to solve, "You seem familiar. Did we meet last time I was Earth?"

"Oh, um, well, kind of, I guess," Connie replied a little nervously, lowering her hand, "I was there at that, um, water tower you were building back then."

"You were?"

"Yeah," Connie said with a nod, "I didn't really… do much…. But I was there."

"Hmm… If you say so. I think I've heard Steven and the Gems mention you before. You're Stevens friend, right?"

Connie nodded.

"Well, if you're Stevens friend, then I'm sure we'll get along just fine."

Connie smiled and nodded.

"Yeah, I'm sure we will too."

* * *

The group spent a few hours going around Funland, doing as Steven had suggested. Lapis didn't much take to the games that they played aside from the one where you shoot a stream of water at a target in order to fill up a balloon that she excelled at. The others accused her of using her powers to cheat at it, but Lapis steadfastly denied their claims. The rides, on the other hand, Lapis adored. While she enjoyed all of the rides, she found herself drawn to the roller coaster and insisted on riding it again and again. By the end of the day, she estimated that she had ridden it at least fifteen times. She had lost count somewhere around there but was having too much fun to care.

As things wound down, Steven and Connie went to go ride on the carousel while Lapis and Amethyst decided not to join them. Lapis felt it was the least thrilling of all the rides and didn't feel it needed to ridden again and Amethyst just didn't feel like it. The Gems sat on a nearby bench and watched the two children ride in slow circles on the backs of fake horses.

"This has been a really fun day," Lapis said after a moment.

"Yep. Sure has," Amethyst replied.

"A lot more fun then you could have on Homeworld," Lapis said with a small chuckle.

Amethyst gave a non-committal grunt and a shrug in response. Lapis looked at her for a moment, then up at the sky.

"Do you ever miss Homeworld?" she asked.

"Nope."

"What? How can you not miss it?" Lapis asked incredulously, turning to the smaller Gem.

"It's kinda hard to miss a place you've never been to."

"Never been… Wait. Were you made here, in a Kindergarten?"

The small smile that had been on Amethysts face went away as she let out a sigh and looked down.

"Yeah," she replied quietly, "It's not something I really like talking about."

"Oh. I'm sorry for bringing it up."

"Nah, it's… It's okay. It's not like you knew"

"I… I guess so. Although I probably would've figured it out on my own."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, Homeworld has a pretty strict policy about what to do when off colors are made up there."

"Off colors?"

"Yeah, it's a term for Gems that don't come out right. Gems that have problems or defects. Gems that are just, you know, off."

Amethysts whole body tensed at that, fists clenched tight in her lap, shaking slightly.

"I didn't come out right? I… How was I supposed to be?"

"Well, you're a Quartz. Quartzes are made to be soldiers. They're supposed to be tall, broad shouldered, and muscular, like Jasper."

Amethyst was quiet for a long moment, the shaking in her fists growing more intense and beginning to move to the rest of her.

"So, I'm just a mistake then?" she said angrily, her voice soft and trembling, "Just a defective Gem that no one wants?"

Lapis was taken aback and unsure how to respond.

"No, that's… That's not what I was… I didn't mean to…" she stammered, before turning away, "I'm… I'm sorry."

Amethyst continued to look down and said nothing.

When Steven and Connie got off the ride, they could tell something was wrong, and figured that they probably shouldn't say anything. Connie figured that given the circumstances, she should head home and after quick call to her parents, she said her goodbyes and headed off.

The walk back to the temple was a bit uncomfortable as both Amethyst and Lapis remained silent the whole way over. When they got to the house, they found Pearl sitting on the couch reading a book. She looked up as they came in and smiled warmly at them.

"Hello everyone. Did you all have fun today?" she said cheerfully.

Amethyst walked through the room, ignoring Pearl as she went straight to the temple door and entered her room. Pearl watched her, then turned back to the other with a look of concern.

"Did something happen?"

"I'm not really sure," Steven said, "Amethyst wouldn't say anything and Lapis doesn't seem to want to talk either."

Pearl looked the blue Gem, who turned away when she did. Pearl let out a small sigh and shook her head.

"I see. Well, whatever it was, I'm sure Amethyst will be okay. She probably just needs some time to herself right now."

* * *

Lapis sat on the beach, staring at the stars above her. She didn't react to the sound of footsteps in the sand as Garnet walked over and sat next to her.

A few minutes after they had gotten back home, Garnet appeared via the warp pad. Pearl headed over to temple door when she did, saying that she needed to go do something in her room, but Lapis suspected she probably going to go talk to Amethyst. Her suspicions were compounded when, as Pearl walked by Garnet she stopped for a moment and whispered something to her. Garnet nodded and came out into the main room as Pearl entered the temple.

Steven, Garnet, and Lapis spent the next couple of hours watching something that Steven had called a 'movie' on the device he had called a 'tv'. After it was over, Steven went to bed and Lapis and Garnet headed outside.

"I'm pretty used to being the only quiet one," Garnet said after a few minutes, "It's a bit… odd sitting here like this with someone else not talking."

Lapis sighed and bowed her head forward.

"If something's wrong, you can talk to me. I'm pretty good at keeping secrets and giving advice."

Lapis remained silent.

"If you don't want to talk about it, that's fine too. I won't try to force you to do anything you don't want to."

"I'm…I'm afraid that if I talk… I'm afraid that I'll… I'll say something that will… upset you," Lapis finally said after a long moment, "I already did that with Pearl last night and then again today with Amethyst."

Lapis sighed and shook her head.

"I… I can't say anything to anyone without making them hate me. It's easier if I just don't talk."

"I figured that's what was wrong," Garnet said, nodding.

"Maybe I should just leave," Lapis said, "Just go back into the ocean. I can't make anyone hate me if I'm there."

"And what would that accomplish? You'd just be running away from your problems and that won't solve them, it'll just make them worse. You have to face them to fix them."

"But the things I said to Pearl and Amethyst… I… I can't…"

"I talked to Pearl earlier. The things you said to her were certainly bad, but there was no malice behind them. You weren't trying to hurt Pearl when you said those things. You were curious. You wanted to know something, so you asked about it. You had no idea what those words would do and when you saw, you apologized. Pearl knows all that. It hurt her for a bit, but she got over it, because she knows you didn't mean to hurt her. I don't know what you said to Amethyst, but I'm sure she knows to. And if not, then I'm sure Pearl explained that to her."

Lapis sighed again and looked down.

"There just so much I don't know though. Anytime I talk, I'm running the risk of saying something that'll hurt one of you. I mean, sure it's teaching me what I should and shouldn't say to each of you, but this being the way I learn those things? That… That shouldn't be the way I learn. You guys…. You guys need to tell me these things. Otherwise I'm just going to keep bringing these things up. I'm going to keep hurting you all."

Garnet was silent for a long moment before sighing and nodding her head.

"You're right," she said, "We do need to tell you things. You can't learn if we don't teach. I'll talk to the others, figure out when and how we should do it."

She looked over at Lapis and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"You don't need to worry. Everything's going to be okay."

* * *

Thanks for reading, and be sure to leave a nice review!


End file.
